“I should be better at this by now” – Letting go of the language guilt

It's a phrase I hear a lot when meet new clients who have been struggling with learning a foreign language.

"I've been here now for some time, and I should be better, other people seem to manage it, but I can't".

Sound familiar?  Let's see if we can look at it differently.

In the world of personal finance, we talk about "sunk costs". This is money spent that you can't get back. In the world of moving to a new country, we often deal with "emotional sunk costs."

We carry around years of guilt because we aren't as fluent as we "should" be, or because we still struggle to understand the baker or the bank manager.

But the reality is: guilt is a poor language teacher. 

The High Cost of 'Should'

Too much pressure to learn a language often gets in the way, when we start to make absolute demands to ourselves, we often get resistance. Suddenly language learning seems like a chore and the frustration continues. 

How Hypnosis Helps Your Language Learning

The answer is not to study harder, or buy more textbooks.  Of course some study is important, but the vast majority you are going to learn through practice. 

When I work with clients indvidually, there are typically a few strategies I will use to help move the needle.

• Letting go of years of guilt and shame, accepting the progress and to shifting language learning to become fun, challenging, like trying to solve a puzzle.
• Quietening the inner critical voice.
• Building a confident and playful mental state so you can start to speak more and seek out opportunities. 

Make a Fresh Start

If you’re tired of carrying that "I should be better" weight around, perhaps it’s time to try a different way. We don't need to dig through the past, we just need to clear the path for your future.